Relationships Prior to Marriage
Most of the boyfriend/girlfriend relationships we see today do not match the type of relationship needed to translate into a successful marriage. Those relationships are usually not formed for the right purpose, nor do they contain the right kind of preparation or practice. Going from that type of relationship into a marriage relationship is extremely difficult. As a result there ends up being a lot of repair work that needs to be done after the marriage ceremony. If a person really loves his/her future spouse they certainly would not want to conduct any of their relationships prior to marriage in a way that would cause them problems after marriage.

Dating, the way it usually takes place today, is nothing more than divorce practice. People often create temporary dating relationships to interview candidates to see which one will qualify for a permanent relationship. They test people out to see if he/she will meet his or her expectations or not. If an individual doesn’t, then it’s on to the next candidate. This concept, often repeated several times, makes a person an expert at temporary commitments. Then, after getting married, because they have made a habit of temporary trial relationships, he/she is likely to continually test their marriage partner out to see if that person is currently meeting their expectations or not. If not, then it’s on to the next one. Since God intends marriage to be permanent; a person cannot prepare for that by practicing with a bunch of temporary relationships. It is also an illogical concept to believe that a person can try another person out for a marriage relationship with a temporary one for that same reason; marriage requires a permanent commitment to be experienced correctly.

Faithfulness to a Future Spouse
A major contradiction found in those relationships that do not match what is required in marriage is faithfulness. Faithfulness is the lifetime commitment to remain emotionally and physically devoted to only one person and is one of the requirements of marriage that should also be practiced prior to entering it. However, due to the double standard created by our society, it has become acceptable to believe that type of commitment to one person throughout a person’s single years doesn’t matter and is not something someone should concern themselves with. Under that worldly standard, it really doesn’t matter how many boyfriends/girlfriends a person has before he/she gets married. But, the truth is, having a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship with someone you will never marry is contrary to being faithful to the one you will eventually marry. Why? Because you are giving away pieces of your heart, creating memories that become physical and emotional baggage that can be carried into a marriage. A boyfriend/girlfriend relationship should be reserved only for a person’s future spouse.

For those of you who have already been involved in a relationship not ordained by God, God’s best for you is to acknowledge your mistake as being detrimental to a future marriage, even if you didn’t know at the time it was wrong. Then commit from now-on to have only one romantic relationship. Never should anyone think, “I have already blown it, so what does it really matter if I do the wrong thing again.” With each mistake we make there is more damage done. Always limit your mistakes. Make the best of whatever situation you find yourself in.

Currently many people have a detrimental belief concerning when a person should begin to be faithful to their future spouse. There is always a period of time prior to marriage when a person has no idea who their mate is going to be. Many people use this fact of not knowing who that particular person will be as seemingly legitimate reason to lessen their commitment to them. Those people do not believe it is necessary to have the same level of commitment to be faithful to their future spouse whom they haven’t met up to this point, as they would have if they already knew them. When in reality, the level of commitment both before and after meeting a future spouse should be identical. Not knowing who their future spouse is going to be does not give anyone the freedom to not save all of their romantic emotions and affections for that future spouse. In order to practice faithfulness, a person should be faithful for a lifetime to their spouse, both before and after they meet them.